Mushy stone

So what do you do when you have lost touch with reality?
When you really don't know where you belong?
When you think you have lost the essence of who you are?
When you no longer recognize those around you?

Its not that I've changed, it is that in the process of learning and living, I've realized who is ready to commit and who is not. This does not necessarily mean I am actually learning from what I have come to realize; nor from what I've lived. Maybe the slap in across my face is not moving fast enough.

Things I used to hate and despise in others, I am beginning to find in myself...in who I am. Some people I love, others I just love to hate.

Are those qualities that I despise, the same as those I despise in myself?

I am letting those people get to me and I shouldn't. I am stronger than they are...I am who I am.

But its not true, I pretend to be tough, but if you knew me, if you really knew me, you'd know I'm mush. That I melt in your hand. That you can do as you please and for that, I am still angry at.
I let you in, and the layers keep peeling. You keep asking and I keep letting you in. You keep pushing but I never tell you no.

Well, guess what, it is my turn. I will tell you no. I will tell you that you are being unfair. I will tell you how I feel, because if you don't give a shit...then I shouldn't give a shit either. It is because I am tired of caring more about you than you care about me.